


No Basis For a System of Government

by patientalien



Series: why don't we do a little day drinkin' [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Crack, Gen, Humor, References to Monty Python
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-02
Updated: 2021-01-02
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:20:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 577
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28490796
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/patientalien/pseuds/patientalien
Summary: Korg means to start a revolution. Thor doesn't disagree.Or: Thor and Korg unwittingly re-invent Monty Python and the Holy Grail.
Relationships: Korg of Krona & Thor
Series: why don't we do a little day drinkin' [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1346371
Comments: 6
Kudos: 14





	No Basis For a System of Government

**Author's Note:**

  * For [youdbetterbeready](https://archiveofourown.org/users/youdbetterbeready/gifts).



> So this has been brewing for a hot minute. Enjoy!

“I want to start a revolution, mate, you in?”

Thor glances up from the television and runs his thumb over the opening of the beer bottle in his hand. It’s almost empty. “Sure, why not?” he shrugs. “The king here sucks.”

Korg tilts his huge, rocky head. “There’s a king here?” he asks, and Thor wonders if the Kronan has been paying any attention at all these past couple years.

“Um, yeah, me, I’m king.” In a manner of speaking, anyway. Thor tilts his beer against his lips and lazes back a bit more on the sofa. Much more comfortable than that solid gold throne back in Asgard, anyway. 

“I didn’t know we had a king,” Korg informs him. “I thought we were an autonomous collective.”

Thor sighs. “No. We’re not. I’m the king.”

“I don’t remember voting for you,” Korg comments.

Thor’s eyebrows meet as he scrunches up his face, trying to decide if Korg is being serious, or if Thor himself is drunker than he thinks he might be. “You don’t vote for kings,” he informs his friend. 

Korg crosses his massive arms over his chest. “How’d ya become king, then?” he challenges. 

“What the - Korg, you were there!” Thor exclaims, using up a little of his energy for the day sitting up straighter, leaning over his knees as if closer proximity to Korg might give him more insight. 

“Well, yeah, but it seems like other people might be better suited -” As if the thought has never once crossed Thor’s mind. 

“Well, my father gifted me with Mjolnir as a sign of my worthiness, and declared that I would be king. Then he died, and my hammer was destroyed, and then Asgard was destroyed, which makes me king now,” Thor explains, pressing thumb and forefinger into his eye sockets. 

Korg doesn’t look particularly convinced, nor impressed. “Old men passing out hardware doesn’t seem like a solid basis for a system of government,” he offers. “Supreme executive power should come from a mandate from the masses, not some farcical construction-based ceremony!” 

Thor finishes his beer and opens another one. “Sure, okay,” he says because he doesn’t really know what else  _ to _ say to that. 

“You can’t expect to wield supreme power because your dad threw a hammer at you.”

“Yup, I got that.” He wonders if Korg realizes they’re technically on the same side of this argument. 

“I mean, if I went around saying I was Emperor ‘cause some geezer lobbed a screwdriver at me, people would put me away!”

“Korg, shut up.” 

“Ohhhh, I see, Your Majesty! This is just more proof of the violence inherent in the system! I’m being repressed!”

“Oh my  _ god _ , you are  _ not _ !” 

The door swings open, but instead of salvation, the bane of Thor’s existence is standing there with her arms crossed over her chest. “Valkyrie! Thor’s repressing me! We should have a revolution!” 

“Uh huh,” Valkyrie replies, looking past Korg at Thor. There’s warring disgust and sympathy on her face, a familiar expression. “Make sure you print enough pamphlets this time.”   


“Oh! You’re right! The logistics -"

"Okay, that's it. I'm done for the day." Thor hauls himself upright. "Goodbye." He bumps fists/leg-type attachments with Miek on his way into the bedroom. 

"I mean, I don't think a real king would have shit all over him, right? Korg asks Valkyrie.

Valkyrie shrugs and drains the beer. "Hell if I know," she says. "I haven't shit myself in weeks." 


End file.
